Accountability - Week 13

May was a terrible month for training (and accountability) but I am back!  I didn't have a stellar week but I walked more miles than was called for this weekend.  It felt good.  After pushing the boys for seven miles yesterday, today's 4 mile walk was a piece of cake.  I invested in my "hydration system" -- who knew there was such a thing? And picked up some different brands of socks to see which ones I like the best. 

I'm really looking forward to next weekend when we have some "girl walks" planned.  It's been a busy couple of weeks for all of us and I've missed catching up with my friends.  

On the fundraising front I am less than $600 away from exceeding my goal of raising $4600 and Linda's Ladies has raised $10,703.28  I am just so proud of us.  If anyone has any experience in getting corporate donors/sponsors will you drop me a line?  I'd love to pick your brain.

 Accountability - Week 13
Weeks until Walk -20
Funds Raised to Date - $4051.14
Miles Walked to Date - 138.3
Monday - Rest
Tuesday -2.8
Wednesday - Rest
Thursday - 0
Friday - -0
Saturday - 7 miles pushing the kids (that should count for at least 10 right??)
Sunday - 4 miles

Milestones

It's a big week for Linda's Ladies.  It's a big week for me.

When I set out on this journey last year I committed to raising $2300.  I was nervous.  I hoped I could do it.  I was prepared to put my own money up if I couldn't meet that minimum.  This week I crossed the $4000 mark.  It's unbelievable to me.  I am so grateful that others believe in what I am doing.  I am so grateful that others share the goal, the desire to find a cure and beat breast cancer once and for all.

When I set out on this journey I did it alone.  But I wasn't alone for long.  And today, I am teamed up with five other wonderful women who are passionate about this war.  And as we linked our arms our impact grew exponentially.   This week my team, Linda's Ladies, crossed $10,000!  It's amazing.  I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around it.  And then I think that we are just one team amongst hundreds of teams and millions of individuals who are joined in battle and the weight of what we are doing towards a collective goal leaves me speechless. 

Today I am taking a few minutes to enjoy how far we have come.  I am taking a little time to give thanks for the generosity of friends, family, and even a couple of strangers.  Today I will celebrate all we have accomplished. 

And tomorrow, well tomorrow I'll march on and look back on this milestone week fondly but push towards greater things!  Tomorrow I'll keep walking towards a cure.

Accountability - Week 9

This week was a walking bust - but I wouldn't have traded it.  We took the boys to Florida to spend some time with their Great Grandparents.  It was a wonderful trip! 


Today I get back on track.
Accountability - Week 8
Weeks until Walk -23
Funds Raised to Date - $3693.14
Miles Walked to Date - 97.85
Monday - Rest
Tuesday - Worked Late
Wednesday - Prepping for Trip
Thursday - Vaca
Friday - Vaca
Saturday - 3 miles in Fl.
Sunday - Vaca

Accountability - Week 8

It's here.  Tomorrow starts the official count down to the walk.  Tomorrow starts the official training schedule.  I am so excited.  I am so ready for this.  The first couple weeks should be a breeze but then miles start stacking up quickly.  My game face is on!  I am determined to rock this walk. 

And 8 weeks!  EIGHT WEEKS.  That's like two months.  I've been doing this accountability thing for two whole months and it's working.  


I've talked before about how easily I tend to give up on things.  I have to say I am very happy with how consistent I have been.  Sure, there are weeks where I haven't kept pace but looking back on the last 8 weeks I have been pretty steady. 

Every time I contemplate trading in my sneakers for the couch I think about my mom and how this is more than just a walk.  This is more than just raising money to beat breast cancer.  This is a promise I made to her.  This is a promise to keep fighting, to keep walking in her name.  It makes tying those laces a little bit easier. 

Accountability - Week 8
Weeks until Walk -24
Funds Raised to Date - $3693.14
Miles Walked to Date - 94.85
Monday - Rest
Tuesday - Raining
Wednesday - 4 miles
Thursday - Off
Friday - Should have walked but I didn't
Saturday - 4 miles around the University of Maryland
Sunday - 6 miles

Accountability Report - Week 7

This week I worked to get myself back on track and feel that overall I was successful.  I Would have liked to walk on Sunday but the weather got the best of me.

On a fundraising note I crossed the $3600 threshold.  I am less than $1000 away from my goal of $4600.  Today we are $3693.14 closer to a cure.  $3693.14 closer to daughters never having to go through what I did.  $3693.14 closer to never having to walk again!

I am so grateful for the generosity I have been shown.  The support, financially and emotionally has been overwhelming. 

Accountability - Week 7
Weeks until Walk -25
Funds Raised to Date - $3693.14
Monday - Rest
Tuesday - 3.4 miles
Wednesday - Off
Thursday - 3.4 miles
Friday - off
Saturday - 6 miles
Sunday - Rain rain go away -- couldn't get motivated to do anything!

Accountability - Week 6

It was a busy week (I feel like I say that a lot).  I didn't walk until late in the week and I realized I was cranky and anxious and blech.  I never understood people who said that they felt off when they didn't work out.  It appears I may now be one of those people!

Accountability - Week 6
Weeks until Walk -26
Funds Raised to Date - $3593.14
Monday - Busy
Tuesday - Busy
Wednesday - Busy
Thursday - Busy
Friday - 3 miles
Saturday - 5 miles
Sunday - 3.5 miles

Accountability - Week 5

I got back into the swing of things this week.  We had our first "official" training walk led by team mate, Maura.  And, despite it being a crazy busy weekend, filled with company and food, I made walking a priority.

Accountability - Week 5
Weeks until Walk -27
Funds Raised to Date - $3518.14
Monday - Rest
Tuesday - 3.4 miles
Wednesday - Off
Thursday - 2.6 miles (Will was super cranky so we cut the walk short to get him  home and in bed)
Friday - Lots of shopping and cleaning and cooking
Saturday - 4.4 miles.  We had our first training walk (3.4 miles) which I walked to (adding an additional mile to the total)
Sunday - 3.4 miles

Accountability - Week 4

Motivation was severely lacking this week.  Like big time.  My walking hit a wall.  My fundraising has hit a wall.

The big success was not climbing under a blanket with a big gallon of ice cream and a spoon.

Oh well.  A new week starts tomorrow.

On a very positive note, Maura, one of my teammates, crossed the $3000 mark this week bringing our team total to $9482.28.  We are so so close to crossing the $10,000 mark.  AND we are the 6th highest fundraising team for the DC walk.  Her big accomplishment helped motivate me on Friday!

Accountability - Week4
Weeks until Walk -28
Funds Raised to Date - $3518.14
Let's not even talk about Monday-Friday (unless you want to hear about my thoughts on the Hunger Games).
Saturday - 4.25 miles in my new fancy shoes.  Ouch
Sunday - 3.3 achy miles.  I'm sure paying for yesterday's mistake!

Next weekend we have our first official training walk.  Maura is a training walk leader and we are going to kick off with a 3.4 mile walk.  It will be fun to meet other three day participants.

Gearing Up

When you buy new shoes and custom fit insoles and the experts at the shoe store tell you to break them in slowly you should probably listen.

And not take them out for a 4 mile trial the day you buy them.

Because if, hypothetically, you decided to wear them for a 4 mile walk, I bet you'd be pretty sore.  Like very, I've-never-walked-more-than-around-the-grocery-store-before sore!  Hypothetically speaking.

But not me, I'm a good listener.  Or maybe I'm not. 

Because today - I'm pretty freaking sore. Oops!

Yesterday SGK had a shoe clinic at Road Runners that I took advantage of.

They talked about the right shoe and the right fit and the right sock.  They gave pointers on what to wear and what to drink and how to keep yourself comfortable (is that possible) and healthy while walking 60 miles over 3 days. 

Road Runners has this really neat system (albeit a pretty cheesy schtick that goes along with it) where they analyze your foot and the way you walk in order to custom fit an insole and pick the right shoe to give you the right amount of support for your planned activity. 

Best thing they give you 90 days to try out your shoes. 

I think I'm going to heed their advice from here on and take it a little slower in my new kicks. 

Happy Walking!

Accountability - Week 3

I took advantage of the longer nights and beautiful weather this week and had a couple of evening walks with the boys.  Unfortunately Saturday was a rainy bust!

Accountability - Week3
Weeks until Walk -29
Funds Raised to Date - $3483.14 

My Walking Buddies

Monday - 2.65 miles with boys in the stroller - a beautiful after work evening walk joined by Maura and Nate
Tuesday - Rest Day
Wednesday - Lazy Day
Thursday - 4 miles with the boys in the stroller
Friday - Decided to hit down town Silver Spring for dinner and yogurt with the boys (No training)
Saturday - Rain rain go away
Sunday - 3 miles with Matt and the boys.

One more month until training officially starts.  I'm glad that I'm getting a head start on it!

Looks like this week brings more good weather.  The early Spring sure has made walking enjoyable!

Accountability - Week 2

I told you I was going to do a weekly wrap up.  Look at me and all my follow through!

This week the weather was absolute perfection.  The week started off great but then I got hit with an awful stomach bug that took me out!  It was a bad scene up in this house.  But I'm feeling better and ended the week on a high note.  

Accountability - Week 2
Weeks until Walk - 30
Funds Raised to Date - $3483.14 ($530 in one week!)

Monday - 2.5 miles with boys in the stroller - a beautiful after work evening walk joined by Maura and Nate
Tuesday - Hello Stomach Flu
Wednesday - Somebody put me out of my misery
Thursday - Still down for the count
Friday - Feeling better but not pushing my luck
Saturday - 5.25 miles pushing the boys.  It was a great walk into town where Sam got to meet a real live fire man, see a real live fire truck and Will got his first taste of FroYo
Sunday - 3 miles pushing the boys

I also bought a new pair of kicks on Saturday.  I've walked about five miles in them so far.  I think they will do just fine. 

I am noticing that the bottom of my feet rub a lot and I'm starting to get some hot spots.  I'm going to have to figure this out before blisters strike. 

This week I want a do over.  My goal is to take advantage of the longer nights and walk a couple of nights after work.

Have a great week everyone!

Hitting my Stride

Today after nap time, I took advantage of the unreal weather and hit the road with the boys.  I'd been sick for the better part of the week and was a little worried that I might still be a little weak, but we headed off towards town.

We were about a mile into our walk when I realized I was actually enjoying it.  It felt GOOD.  I was having fun listening to Sam's running commentary of everything he saw and the stroller I was pushing didn't feel like a burden. 

It's the first walk I have been out on where I wasn't looking forward to the end of it.  I might actually survive this 3-Day! 

I think I'm starting to get in my groove.

Accountability - Week 1

So, as we established earlier today I have a problem staying motivated and being honest about my training.  Tonight is my first weekly wrap up.  These may not be all that interesting but it's just another tool to keep me honest and motivated as I train to walk the Susan G. Komen 3-Day in October.

Accountability - Week 1
Weeks until Walk - 31
While we are talking the walk I'll throw in current fundraising total - $2953.14
Official training doesn't start for another 7 weeks but I'm working to get myself up to a baseline so training doesn't overwhelm me.

Monday - Nada
Tuesday - Nothing
Wednesday - Nope
Thursday - 1.5 miles on treadmill
Friday - no
Saturday - I had the best intentions but then my child pooped on our subwoffer and I needed wine!
Sunday - 3.3 miles trail/road pushing both kids in the stroller

This week I started a new job which is super exciting and motivating and left me mentally exhausted.  Not an excuse, just my reality.

My goal for next week is to take advantage of the beautiful weather forecast and hit the pavement with the boys after work a couple of nights.  I'm going to pack my clothes and change before I leave work so I just have to toss the kids in the stroller and go. 

I Have an Accountability Problem

I have accountability issues.  I like shortcuts -- ones that no one but me need to know about.  No one but me needs to know that I ate that one (two, three -- OK 4!) cookies.  If I put this one purchase on my check card Matt never needs to know about it.  Eh, who will know that I took the short route instead of the long route on my walk. 

I'm pretty sure this is why the only workout regiments that have ever worked for me have been in structured settings.  Swim team, dance class.  I'm an incredibly proud and competitive person.  If there are other people there, gosh darn it I'm going to do it all and do it all well.  But put me on a regiment where I'm the only person who is keeping track of my progress and all resolve goes out the window.  Hello shortcuts! 

I realized this today.  (Yeah- I'm quick -- only took me 33 years)

My team mates had other plans today so I packed the boys up in their stroller, filled up my water bottle, grabbed my iphone, and turned on the MapmyWalk app.  Off we went.  I knew the general route I wanted to take but didn't know the distance but I set off for a planned 3 mile walk. 

As I was entering my neighborhood I took a look at my phone and saw I had only walked 2.2 miles.  The internal debate began. 

I should just head to home.  It would be close to 2.5 miles.  That was good enough.  No one would know.  It's almost three miles.

But I caught myself.  NO!  No, Amanda!  You are training and if you are ever going to be able to complete the 3 day you need to be honest with yourself.  Yup, if you keep going there is going to be another hill -- just take it slow.  If you keep going you may get a blister from that spot that is rubbing weird in your sneaker but that's OK -- you need some blisters now to help prepare your feet for the 3-day.  If you keep going . . . what?  You keep going!

JUST. KEEP. GOING.

The kids are content.  The sun is shining.  You aren't on a schedule.

JUST.  KEEP. GOING.

And you know what, I did.  I headed back out into the neighborhood, straight for the big hill.   And when I pulled the stroller into the drive way I had clocked 3.3 miles. 

So yes, I have an accountability issue and I need the help of everyone to keep me honest.  So as my training kicks into gear I am going to start posting a weekly wrap up of my training. It'll be an opportunity for me to track my progress and journal any challenges or successes I've encountered. 

Here's to accountability!

Thank you!

Ya'll I made my minimum tonight. 

After only 3 months I have hit the $2300 mark. 

And I couldn't have done this without the support, both financial and personal of my donors.  Thank you for reaching into your pockets and hearts to support this effort.  Thank you for listening to me and sharing in my goal to eradicate breast cancer.  Thank you for honoring my mom's memory.

I am overwhelmed. 

This week was emotional, the build up to Will and my mom's birthday.  I thought I would be drained but your support has provided me a spiritual boost that has solidified my drive.  We MUST find a cure.  We must stay focused.  We must no loose site of the goal.  There will be a day when we no longer have to fund raise.  Where we no longer have to walk for a cure.  And together we are on our way. 

I'm not stopping at my minimum.  I have doubled my goal.  $4600 here I come. 

Thank you.  From the bottom of my heart, thank you!

I'm Walking for a Cure . . . Still!

I'm writing this post knowing that it may incite some and bring on attacks but from the onset I want you to know that I have no political motivations.  Having worked in the heart of and close to politics for over ten years I try to get as far away from divisive issues as possible, but after spending the day biting my tongue I decided I needed to say something.

I'm sure by now you have heard that Susan G. Komen (SGK) has decided not to provide further grants to Planned Parenthood (PP) - an organization that offered mammograms to underserved populations.  If you haven't -- google it.  The decision has caused quite an outcry and I've heard many people denounce SGK, say they are pulling out of walks, refuse to fundraise, say they will refuse to donate.  That just makes me sad. 

Before this morning I did not know that SGK provided funds to PP.  It wasn't a factor in me signing up to raise $2300 or walk 60 miles.  What I knew is that they provide funding to organizations that provide mammograms to underserved populations.  Quite frankly, I don't care if the money goes to PP or another organization - as long as the funding continues to serve these communities. 

Personally I don't really have strong feelings about PP one way or the other.  I think I would be writing a similar post if the argument was being made by those opposed to SGK granting money to PP.

What I do have a strong feeling about is finding a cure or a way to prevent this disease that killed my mom and continues to strike way too close to home.  I don't think anyone can refute how much SGK has done to advance the ball in that regard.

I am and have always been walking for a cure -- today hasn't changed that.

My Mom's battle - My War

Tuesday night, my teammates girlfriends and I attended the Susan G. Komen 3 Day Get started meeting. I think we all walked away moved and energized by our mission to make a difference in the fight against breast cancer.  Committed to waging war against this enemy!  I also walked away, having heard the very personal stories of women battling for their life and those that lost.  One particular story so closely mirrored my mom's that I almost lost my breath.  As I listened to the story of this mom's struggle I was moved to tell my own mom's story.  

A warning to close friends and family -- this may be tough to read.  It was torture to write.

This story does not have a happy ending.

In early 2001 as I was getting ready to complete my final year of College I got a call from my mom.  I don't remember the words she said.  I only heard breast cancer.  I can still feel the lump in my stomach.  I can still feel the panic rising.  I know she comforted me -- because that's what mom's do -- they make you believe that everything is going to be alright even when they face fear and uncertainty.  They give you what strength and courage they have to carry you forward.  My mom was 47.

The doctors moved quickly scheduling a lumpectomy.  The date was set.  It happened to be smack dab in the middle of my spring break.  A trip planned with my new boyfriend (now husband) to Disney World.  I wanted to cancel.  She insisted I go.  A mom -- encouraging me to move forward with my life even when she is facing a threat to hers.

I went on the trip.  Matt will tell you I was a mess.  Anxiety and nerves and guilt and fear.  I couldn't have been very fun to be around.  I can still tell you exactly where I was standing when my mom got out of surgery.  My cell phone (it was a rather large contraption in 2001) rang while I was standing at the stairs leading up into the overhang for Big Thunder Mountain.  Reception was bad -- we let the line pass us by so I could talk to my dad.  The news -- mom was out of surgery.  It went well.  Looks like they got it all.

Relief.

Tears.

Smiles.

Chemo, radiation and years of hormone therapy followed.  Her hair thinned.  She went into early menopause.  She hated how tired she was, how sick the treatments made her.  But she looked that big ugly beast cancer square in the eye and she beat it.  She repeated "I think I can."  She told the cancer she hated it.  She told the cancer she was stronger than it -- strong like bull. She told the cancer she had more to do.  She told the cancer she was in control of her life!  Through it all she was brave, she was strong, she remained the center of our family.  She remained the unwavering friend.  She became my hero!

In 2006 she celebrated her 5 year survival date.  I began to breathe easier.  Not worried that cancer would jump out from its hiding spot.  She hated her yearly mammogram.  I think she skipped a few -- the fear of the other shoe dropping would get the better of her.  But year after year, they would come back clear.

In 2009 my mom fell ill shortly after the New Year with what appeared to be a nasty flu.  It knocked her down for weeks.  After numerous visits to the Dr. and finally an admission to the hospital she was getting a full work up.  Her liver enzymes were out of whack which led to an ultrasound and a diagnosis of severe cirrhosis of the liver.  More tests and a biopsy.  A call from my mom telling me it was cancer.  Metastatic disease.  Her breast cancer had metastasized to her liver.  I fell apart.  She put me back together.  A mom!

The oncologist was optimistic.  Gave her and me hope.  Talked about a long life.  Multiple rounds of chemo and tests followed.  I made appointments with John's Hopkins and Sloan Kettering.  Appointments my mom would never make.  Less than three months later my mom was admitted to the hospital. Unresponsive.  Her liver was failing.  We were aggressive with her meds which brought her back to us for a few short days.  Days my family and I lived in the hospital breaking every hospital protocol.  Days where her friends and family put life aside to spend with her.  I let her share my news with everyone -- I was 8 weeks pregnant.

During those days we protected her.  It was my decision.  I didn't want her to be scared.  I didn't want her to know that she was losing her battle.  I wanted those days to be filled with love and laughter.  For her last days to be as full as possible.  Maybe I was wrong to do this.  I still question this decision.  Maybe I should have let people be honest with her.  Let her say goodbye.  Let her leave on her terms.  I couldn't!  I wouldn't!  Deep down I believe she knew -- I took weeks off of work, her family flew in from all over the country.  This wasn't normal.  But it was my turn.  My mom always protected me.  Comforted me.  Calmed my fears.  In her last days I knew I had to do this for her.

Her liver Dr. scolded me.  He wanted me to let her go peacefully, stop medical interventions.  Stop her drugs.  It was too late he said.  I wasn't ready to give up.  She wasn't either.   We're fighters -- strong like bull!

We tried one more round of chemo.  Hoping it would start reversing the tumors that had taken over her liver.  We planned a Derby day party with hats and virgin mint juleps.  We never had the party.  The chemo was too much.  Her liver was too weak.  She slipped back into unconsciousness.  It would be her last round.

The night before she died I laid in bed with my mom.  Holding her too me and told her that we would be OK.  That I would be OK.  I told her if she wanted to she could let go.  She didn't have to fight anymore.

On May 5, 2009 my mom lost her battle to breast cancer.  She was surrounded by family who held her hands while she took her last breath.  Who told her it was OK to go while her heart beat for minutes after.  The nurse told us she had a strong heart -- of course she did!

My mom may have lost her battle but the war isn't over.  Her fight mattered.  Her story matters.   I walk because I can.  I walk because she can't.  I walk to win her war.

Note: I am walking in the Susan G. Komen 3 Day in memory of my mom.

Beyond the Pink Ribbon

Who does not know what a pink ribbon stands for?  The color pink has become synonymous with breast cancer.  Throughout the month of October virtually every store and business finds a way to go pink in support of breast cancer education. I would say the effort to educate the public about breast cancer, the risk and the need for regular screening has been a screaming success.  

On the other hand we have so far to go in the search for a cure.

• Every 3 minutes one person in the U.S. is diagnosed with breast cancer
• More than 1.4 million women are diagnosed with breast cancer a year globally
• Every 69 seconds a woman dies of breast cancer

It is my belief that as a community we need to shift our focus from education to research.  Cutting edge research that will one day find a cure for this horrific disease. 

That is why I am so proud that 75% of funds raised by The 3-Day go to ground-breaking research focused on decreasing breast cancer incidence and mortality over the next decade.

Finding Time

So I'm training for the Susan G. Komen 3-Day where I will walk 60 miles in 3 days to raise money for breast cancer research and education.  Right now this sounds very daunting to this out-of-shape, post-baby body.  Thank goodness I have close to 11 months to get my body ready for this challenge.

BUT . . . 

I have great intentions, I really do.  I plan to get up early and walk.  But in order to walk and get to work in time I need to leave the house by 5:30 and with two little ones who are still learning how to sleep those early morning hours are REALLY REALLY HARD.  It's dark by the time I get home with the boys and I'm a afraid of my own shadow so taking the boys on a walk after work is out of the question.  Weekends are a whirlwind and with the holiday's coming up time is at a premium.

I'm at a loss and need a workable solution otherwise I am going to be one sorry lady in 11 months!